Sleep eludes me.

While working on a project (Photos printed on magnets for our new trailer) I was sorting through my… many… digital photos. NOT the smartest thing for me to do right before bed.

There are so many pictures of Annie, missing for 11 months. Right now I can still say she was with us this time last year… that is a milestone I do not want to hit.

Photos of me skinny(ier), friends that are no longer here, horses pre-scarring injuries…

Yet, also photos of the children growing, laughing, playing. My husband and his family. Our dogs and cats enjoying a lazy life.

The good out weighs the bad but I battle melancholy and sometimes wonder if perhaps I take to many photos. Perhaps some of the sadness for past events would fade faster without so many reminders.

Then I find a photo that captures a wonderful moment that might have been forgotten and it reminds me not just of that moment, but that I am grateful for all the photos because while yes, I have my hurts mixed in, I don’t want to forget them.

Who wants to forget their mothers eyes? Moments of a friendship that has parted ways but was wonderful when it was there? The golden eyes of a beloved dog that may yet come home or the warm brown ones of the dog that is long buried? A daughter’s smile and her sister’s laugh…

So it wasn’t the brightest idea to rifle through photographs before bed… but as I ramble before going to sleep… I realize that I am one of those people that likes to move on by having something to look back on. Whether with smiles or tears and hopefully a good mix of both.

Thank you, Louis-Jacques-Mande Daguerre.

Why no photos shown in a blog post about pictures? That would be because right now I can’t just pick one and this is not the place to overwhelm people with our family memories in living color. Just know my girls are way prettier than me, my dogs are amazingly cute, the horses are amazingly awesome and my husband is the best.

And those pictures remind me of that and much more.

About Mathair ~ Inion ~ Sior

Mother, daughter, wife, horse rider, dog hugger, cat whipped, career minded, reading, game playing new blog writer.
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